Moira’s Lake was designed to be listened to like a movie or a book, as one continuous musical story. It’s emotionally intense, often complex and sometimes even a bit uncomfortable.
The story paints a tragic picture of human nature and the self-destructive choices we can make. Murders and ghosts aside, on the surface, the story appears to be about the negative things that relationships can do to us, but at its core, it’s secretly a metaphor about the darker side of creativity.
Musically, it combines technical progressive metal and suspenseful film scores, with a dark, almost theatrical feel. The music is intended to act more as a soundtrack to the story, rather than a typical album of individual songs.
Take A Listen
Below you can listen to all of the songs from Moira’s Lake.
NEED A SONG SUGGESTION?
#6 “Chapter 6: The One That Got Away”
A more accessible song, with a strong hook and energetic instrumental passages.
#9 “Chapter 9: A Million Pieces”
An evolving progressive song that twists and turns through different dark emotional moments of the story.
#10 “Chapter 10: A Love That Lasts Forever”
A short and bittersweet song with an almost mournful, and sadly-beautiful feel.
“Chapter 1: A Tragic Cycle”
From the 2009 album “Moira’s Lake”, by Envinity
LYRICS
Sodden skin run aground
Still bleeding from the throat
Six grows the water's legend
This should have been my time
STORY
APRIL 27th 1939. 1:48am
The dismal overcast sky reflected his spirits. The sheriff stared at the body, gently bobbing facedown near the shore of the lake. It upset him more than he cared to admit. He should have been used to it by now. He had seen death before, far too many times now.
Even as he turned the body over, he knew what he would see. The neck was slashed from one side to the other.
The blood had clotted already, the deep red gash taunting him. A shiver danced through the sheriff’s body as he wondered how many more bodies he would find. Somehow, he already knew the answer.
“Chapter 2: …And Her Name Was Fate”
From the 2009 album “Moira’s Lake”, by Envinity
LYRICS
I saw an innocence inside of her eyes
A tranquil lust resides in those eyes
I saw the waters break inside of her eyes
An urgent desperation begs inside of those eyes
No I can't believe
No I can't believe that this is really real
I know the fates have brought me to this place
And she's the reason
No I can't believe
No I can't believe how strongly that I feel
For this beauty that just until now
Existed nowhere
Live for this change in me
Like I've not been awake before
Live for the taste of you
'Cause I can't find another way
I can't foresee my true desire waning
Fatalistic, once I saw you I felt like I was home
Thought selfish I am, life consumes me, but somehow you cut through
Once void and missing, it falls together as pieces of the whole
All of me knows time is wasted, not within your arms
I saw an innocence inside of her eyes
A tranquil lust resides in those eyes
I saw the waters break inside of her eyes
An urgent desperation begs inside of those eyes
No I can't believe
No I can't believe that this is really real
I know the fates have brought me to this place
And she's the reason
No I can't believe
No I can't believe how strongly that I feel
For this beauty that just until now
Existed nowhere
Let go
Fall down
As the sun falls down on me
I know this is truly meant to be
As the sun falls down
We live in the afterglow
Live for this change in me
Like I've not been awake before
Live for the taste of you
'Cause I can't find another way
I can't foresee my true desire waning
Let go
Fall down
STORY
APRIL 19th 1939. 11:04pm
The small backwoods cabin was rustic, with a strange air of mystery clinging to it. It was perfect. Completely alone and apart from chaos of the city, it provided the ideal inspirational environment for creativity.
Jonathan, a New York resident, had rented the cabin sight unseen in this secluded, shrouded area to begin work on his next mystery novel. Though Jonathan Kent was not yet a household name, he knew that this third novel would put him on the map, and reveal his genius to the world.
The following weeks brought ample creative inspiration, as he stayed cloistered in the eerie old house. Day after day, he wrote furiously as the powerful words flowed out of him.
But that particular night, life changed forever for Jonathan. It was raining heavily and lightning crashed across the sky. A bit of a cliché, he thought, but still a fitting night to write a mystery. In the flickering light of the kerosene lamp, Jonathan’s fingers flew across the typewriter. He was just a few chapters away from completion of his new masterpiece.
A knock at the door shattered his trance-like concentration, and he stalked to the door angrily. He was working! He just wanted to be left alone. Who would come at this late hour? It was ridiculous!
He yanked the door open, and the resentful words he had been about to utter died stillborn on his lips.
She stood there, hair and clothes sopping wet. She was radiant. Jonathan stood in awe of the most amazingly beautiful creature he had ever laid eyes on.
“I got caught in the storm and saw your light on.” Her voice had a soothing familiarity to it, at odds with the cacophony of the storm.
Mystery novel strangely forgotten, he immediately invited the girl in out of the rain. She sat near the fire and gazed at him. Before long, Jonathan found himself droning on and on about his writing, trying not to stare too much at her perfect face. She probably couldn’t help being seductive even while listening.
With a certain disappointment, Jonathan suddenly realized that the squall had passed by. The rain and thunder had subsided. She noticed, too, and stood up.
Without speaking, she took his hand and led him out into the night. The moon shone brightly between the broken clouds and guided their way through the forest. Within a few minutes they arrived at a clearing. He took in a deep breath at the sight of picturesque lake surrounded by thick shadowy trees. It was as if he had dreamed this place before.
On a sandy embankment, she pulled him down to her. Without hesitation he kissed her deeply. They embraced passionately, absorbed in the urgency of their desires.
“Chapter 3: Apparition In The Water”
From the 2009 album “Moira’s Lake”, by Envinity
LYRICS
Fight the feelings and wash away the sins of you and I
I'm revealing the pleasures in distractions I've ignored
And I know it's deceiving how she filtered through the life I kept my own
There's no meaning, so give in or give up don't be a fool
I can't let go
It's beyond all that I know
I thought of myself as stronger
Charisma supplants my will
This can't go on any longer
She needs so much from me
But if I indulge I'm captured
Everything's in my reach
So why is it hard to let go?
Anything we had is over
I'll leave you here, I have another
Anything we had is over
And still it's hard to tell you "no more"
Did I let her fall right through my fingers?
And through my heart?
Never felt regret the way I do now
All through my heart
Have I come undone? It's so unlike me
To bare my heart
Did I let her fall right through my fingers?
And through my heart?
And this is what I get from love
This is the price I pay for love
I should have stayed away from love
Now this is what I get from love
Do I want this?
Do I need this?
Is love worth this?
Is she worth this?
Yes.
A deafness falls around me
Suddenly I feel I'm not alone
They're drifting through my mind
The water laps at my feet
Images like ripples set the tone
Like all this is a sign
White light apparition
It calls to me
Deny while believing
The ghost is she
Oh no, I can't hide in your eyes
Wait, there's so many more faces
I can see so much pain it's frightening
They tell me to fear this
White light apparition
It calls to me
Deny while believing
The ghost is she
STORY
APRIL 20th 1939. 11:03pm
When Jonathan woke the next morning, he was feeling warm and wonderful about the night before. It was like he had been in some sort of trance; a watery, passionate reality where there were no consequences, where Reason didn’t exist. She was tempting, perfect, angel-like, and above all, dangerous. He hoped she would knock on his door again that night.
Jonathan shook the silly grin from his face, and sat down in front of his typewriter. Now it was time for what was truly important: finishing his third novel.
The soft knock came a little after 11 p.m. He unlocked the door and stared again at the most beautiful face he had ever seen. She gazed lovingly into his eyes, flashing a knowing, yet shy, smile. He took a deep breath and swallowed.
She walked coyly past him through the door and sat down in the large easy chair near the fireplace. There was a palpable connection between them as they stared intensely at each other for several minutes. It took everything in his power to break that compelling gaze.
Then she spoke. "I want you to stay here, Jonathan. Be with me."
And there it was, with an impact of a freight train. He remained outwardly calm, but underneath Jonathan was panicking. The last thing he wanted at a time like this was more commitment. His mind scrambled for what to do, what to say. Why did she have to go and ruin it? he asked himself. In an instinctively defensive reaction, he blurted out the first thing he could think of.
“Once I'm done with the book, I have to go back to New York,” Jonathan said, looking at the ground. “I'm married." The two short, curt words caused her smile to fade and be replaced by a look of hurt confusion.
Jonathan breathed in deeply. "I. . .I'm actually going to be a father soon”. Jonathan couldn’t work up any excitement over this rather marvelous fact. Instead, he felt trapped and helpless.
Reluctantly he looked up to brave her reaction. He had expected her to be sad, maybe even to cry. But what Jonathan saw in her face was not disappointment. It was fury.
With an inarticulate scream of frustration, she raced out of the cabin and into the woods.
Jonathan felt an instant wave of regret sweep over him. Maybe he shouldn’t have told her about his wife. Why couldn’t he have just kept his big mouth shut?! I had a good thing going here. It's not everyday I get to make love with the most beautiful and alluring girl I've ever seen!
Feeling like a fool, Jonathan chased after her through the dense forest. The trail felt much longer that night, but finally, he reached the clearing. She wasn’t there. "Where are you?" He shouted. "I'm sorry!"
Suddenly, the wind began to howl and the entire forest around him clattered and screamed. Jonathan slowly turned around, and there, floating just above the middle of the lake, was a glowing apparition. A woman. Her expression was placid and her eyes vacant. She slowly stretched out her hand to Jonathan, beckoning to him.
Fear froze him in place as a jagged kaleidoscope of images flashed through his head. Visions of men floating dead in the water, throats violently cut open, the beckoning girl, and a strange man who seemed oddly familiar.
Jonathan turned and ran breathless down the path to his cabin. He slammed and locked the door.
“Chapter 4: Simple Printed Words”
From the 2009 album “Moira’s Lake”, by Envinity
LYRICS
I don't believe it's real
I do not trust my eyes
Our minds make the unreal
I know
The proof in a telegram
How could this be their time?
A truth I can't bear to feel
Or to know
I feel the slowing of time
So much more empty inside me
From simple printed words
The candle just went out
STORY
APRIL 21st 1939. 5:13pm
What the hell had just happened? Was he safe? Maybe he should move the couch in front of the door. Maybe he should grab his stuff and get away from there.
A shattering knock at the door!
She’d come after him. Panic shot up and down his spine.
The knock came again, more insistent this time. Jonathan retreated to the farthest wall, eyes riveted to on the doorknob.
After a moment or two of silence, a small yellow envelope was pushed under the door, followed by the sound of footsteps walking away.
Was this some kind of trick?
Cautiously, Jonathan crept softly to the envelope and opened it, alert for any sudden sounds. Inside, he found a Western Union telegram addressed to him.
“Dear Jonathan,
I regret to inform you that your wife has died due to complications in childbirth. Attempts to resuscitate the child were in vain. Please accept my deepest condolences for your loss.
With Sympathy,
Sgt. Daniel J. Thomas, Boston Police Department”
The telegram dropped to the floor. Jonathan stumbled to a chair, eyes rolling back in his head. He passed out.
“Chapter 5: The Grace Of God”
From the 2009 album “Moira’s Lake”, by Envinity
LYRICS
I was always with you, but focused far away
The things I took for granted have disappeared and left me
Have I been so selfish to throw it all away?
Skew my perspectives, and close my eyes and feel this way
It's not the same
Without a word
I take the blame
Of all things in this world
In you I find the grace of god
Of all things in this world
In you I find god
Cry
It's all I can do to feel you
Why
Is all that I do meaningless without you
Cry
It's all I can do to feel you
Why
Does all that I do remind me how you have cried
No I can't believe
No I can't believe that this is really real
For this beauty that's here all along
Has gone away
I lost myself deep in those eyes it's frightening
How I found myself so separate from life believing
That I'm by myself, and stronger alone, but knowing
I lied to myself, without you I'm gone
I'm going
More guilt for me
I am the king of deprecation
I hate myself
Never wanted to be tied down to a life that's mediocre
Now you're gone
Though I loved what you could bring me, resenting you tried to change me
Now you're gone
You should have known at the beginning I was not the one
Now you're gone
I ran from responsibility, ego was my home
Now you're gone
More guilt for me
I am the king of deprecation
I hate myself
The grace of god
Of all things in this world
In you I find the grace of god
Of all things in this world
In you I find god
I feel the slowing of time
So much more empty inside me
From simple printed words
The candle just went out
STORY
APRIL 21st 1939. 9:26pm
Morning brought no relief, no sudden realization that it had all been just a nightmare.
He sat in the middle of the floor with his face buried in his hands. It was like being hit by a tidal wave of hard-won perspective. All he could do was cry it out.
Had he really taken his wife for granted? Had he truly pushed away one of the best things in his life? Was he really never there for her? Could he have saved them if he’d been there?
How could I have been so selfish and thoughtless?
Now things felt very different to him. He’d always been consumed by his work, his creativity. He lived for that purity of the act of creating. He was the lone, brilliant visionary, who led his life by principles that worked solely for him.
His wife had done so much for him, and put up with so much. For the first time, Jonathan wondered why a sweet girl like his wife ever stayed with a self-focused, inattentive person like himself.
Jonathan's tears were thick with guilt.
This all my fault! Everything is always my fault! I don't even deserve to live!
But he didn’t really believe what he was thinking. He knew he should. He should feel profound grief. Instead, he began feeling anger.
No, this is all her fault! She'd known me for years before she married me. She should have known this is how I am. I never wanted to settle down or start a family!
The anger felt good. Therapeutic.
I never wanted to be tied down. All my life I fought the notion of living an average, predictable existence, and look what she made me do!
The telegram on the floor stared at him accusingly. The envelope lay nearby, shouting his guilt.
Sleep didn't come easy.
“Chapter 6: The One That Got Away”
From the 2009 album “Moira’s Lake”, by Envinity
LYRICS
I'll tell
Tell you what you want
I tell you almost anything
If you'll stay with me
You've always had my heart
My body you've known well
I'll tell you you're the only one
And you will stay with me
I'm waiting for the words that will never be spoken by you
And from you mouth the sound of indifference piercing through me
For years I thought you died, and I'd never live again
Just know how much I cried at the thought I'd never know your love again
I admit I tried to replace your memory
But with relief I sighed, I finally have the one that got away
Fatalistic, when I'm with you I feel like I am home
All the boys tried to impress me, but somehow you cut through
Once void and missing, it falls together as pieces of my soul
All of me knows time is wasted not within your arms
For years I thought you died, and I'd never live again
But with relief I sighed, I finally have the one that got away
I'm waiting for the words that will never be spoken by you
And from you mouth the sound of indifference piercing through me
She's the light that keeps my hope alive
He's the light that keeps my hope alive
She's the only reason I survive
He's the only reason I survive
She's the love that never will subside
He's the love that never will subside
She's the hope that keeps my heart alive
He's the hope that keeps my heart
STORY
APRIL 19th 1919. 9:26pm
Dear James,
For the last two years, I feared for you everyday. I’ve been listening to the evening news and checking my mailbox for any sign that you were still alive and would come back to me. I read terrible stories in the paper about you poor young men overseas, each time hoping not to find your name among them.
The thought of seeing you again made my heart leap with joy. You are the only one to ever capture my heart so I hope you took good care of it, as I did yours.
I still relive the events of the night before you left. The things you said to me at our special spot by the lake, and the things I said in return. I deeply regret acting way I did, and terrible words I spoke. I just love you so much, I didn't want you to leave me. Please forgive me. But the important thing is that you lived up to your promise. You came back to me.
I'm sure by now you've heard people talk and you're a bit upset, which is understandable my darling. Meet me tonight after 1:00am at our spot by the lake and I'll explain everything. I love you with all of my heart.
Forever yours,
Moira
P.S. Tell no one. This has to be our secret.
“Chapter 7: Ghosts Around Me”
From the 2009 album “Moira’s Lake”, by Envinity
LYRICS
This time my lies aren't make believe
I wonder if I'm dreaming, and I'm at my wake
To think I can't escape the images
Eyes closed I cannot hide
The ghosts around me I can
The ghosts surround me
I can see them
Tortured by voices, dripping eyes
Silence is bleeding, faceless fear
Death in the water, lifeless cold
Violence in whispers, visions plague
Close my eyes, she calls me
Convince myself it's all me
Turn away, she wants me
Cannot hide, she'll find me
I saw the waters break inside of her eyes
Take the bottle, drink the bottle
I can't face this fear without it
It contradicts my mind
Tortured by voices, dripping eyes
Silence is bleeding, faceless fear
Death in the water, lifeless cold
Violence in whispers, visions plague
The ghosts around me I can
The ghosts surround me
I can see them
STORY
APRIL 22nd 1939. 10:38pm
Someone was in the room. He could feel it. Jonathan’s heart raced as his eyes slowly adjusted to the dim light of the oil lamp across the room. What was that?!? He could barely make out the faint image of a woman. She existed as if in a still camera, double-exposed and out of focus. Her movements were awkward and static, like portions of it were invisible to the human eye. The instant Jonathan became aware of her presence, she began to evaporate.
Was she really there, or wasn’t she?
He shook his head. You write about this stuff, man, don't go believing it now!
Something out of the corner of his eye made him turn around. Near the far wall, he saw the faded image of a man with a contorted face, bleeding from the grotesque wound at his neck. The face rushed toward Jonathan––.
––and then it was gone. Silence. Fear had reached every nerve in Jonathan’s body and he felt as if he was going crazy.
He tried closing his eyes. He tried walking around the cabin like a blind man, bumping into chairs and tripping over the rug, hands outstretched to feel his way.
He’d wake up at night and a young man would be standing at the foot of his bed, neck slashed open. And in an instant the image would disappear. Jonathan would turn over on his stomach and pull the covers up, though he could still see the horrible image in his mind.
No place was safe. He saw her in the kitchen, in the great room, in the bedroom, out on the small porch. Flickering, film-like images of the young girl he had felt so in love with just days ago.
Jonathan glanced in the mirror. His face was haggard, drawn and pale, his eyes sunken. And, of course, she appeared in the mirror, just over his shoulder.
Jonathan sank down to the floor and wept, on the edge of a breakdown.
“Chapter 8: Reflections Of Untruth”
From the 2009 album “Moira’s Lake”, by Envinity
LYRICS
I can barely think anymore
The years keep bringing me back
I don't put much stock in stories
But I believe that there's something else, something different here
I'm still afraid to understand
Lying before me this story grows
The secrets belong here, but somebody knows
What's the connection to this tragic theme?
The lake haunts me sober, and in my dreams
The water's stare full of life, homage to what it's taking
Distinct and familiar sounds, this place reverberating
With all their dissimilar faces, all similarly waiting
To bring me here to remember untruth exonerates me
And I am part of the lie
STORY
APRIL 27th 1939. 2:56am
It was the sixth body found there in the last twenty years. The Sheriff had been haunted by this place since the first body was discovered years ago. He had a killer on his hands, and he figured it had to be someone he knew, or at least, someone who knew him.
It was uncanny, he thought. Each one found just the way he had found Moira. Throat slit, body floating in the lake. His eyes reluctantly took in the bloated and water-wrinkled face of the man in the water. He knew all too well the identity of the man. He shook his head, and stared up into the night sky.
He lit a cigarette and took a deep drag. The exhaled smoke drifted in abstract patterns against the moonlight. He hated coming here. He hated having to remember.
“Chapter 9: A Million Pieces”
From the 2009 album “Moira’s Lake”, by Envinity
LYRICS
I know I'm feeling lonely since someone went away
I know My heart is heavy and I can't bear this time
I know I want you, I always get my way
He'll never return to me, so I will make you mine
Let me break your heart into a million pieces
If you love me I can be the one
To show how much I care
And if you want me I can be the one
So prove to me you care
I was the perfect man in every single way
I'd treat her like a queen, despite the things they'd say
I loved her more than anymore, to me she pledged her heart
I can't forget the day his jealousy would tear my world apart
Her death will become the moment that will trap us all
Masquerade, believe the lie of this charade
Masquerade, of the lives we've made
Some things hold us to tightly, lead us on blindly, keep us denying
The lessons we've learned
Will we constantly fight it, or can we accept it? When truth is not comfort
We embrace the lie
Only something so tragic will make us look back and understand that
We are to blame
Why does anything matter? It's random and scattered, yet we still see meaning
In what is untrue
Rumors have said she is still here with us
We've heard them say that she's still in water
We have never seen her
Don't believe fairy tales, there's someone hiding here among us
Who has kept us aware the cycle will ever be
Repeating throughout our lives
To the selfish hearts that we've known
And the selfish lives that we've sewn
To the selfish souls on our throne
Proves how seldom we have grown
Let me break your heart into a million pieces
STORY
APRIL 26th 1919. 11:04pm
Everyone knew the story. It was the most tragic event in the town’s history. Even the big city up north had caught wind of the sordid story, going as far as reporting the incident on the evening news. Anyone with a radio within the broadcast radius was now focused on the little town.
Though everyone told it a bit differently, the sheriff knew the actual facts.
Moira and James were destined for each other; at least that’s what everyone thought. They were both very young, and had planned their entire lives with each other. Unfortunately, their romance was cut short when James received his deployment orders.
Moira was heartbroken, but James vowed to come back to her. So, with a heavy heart, they said their adieus and hoped that they would be reunited.
Surprisingly soon after James went off to war, Moira married a newer resident of the town, Robert. Robert was a bit older then Moira, and already well established in the community. Though many were shocked by the announcement, those who knew Robert understood that his feelings for Moira had been developing for quite some time. In fact, one friend went so far as to say that he was “a bit obsessed with the girl”.
It was hard to blame him though. Moira was by far the most beautiful girl in town, with a captivating air. Most young men in the town would have leapt at the chance to marry her, but Robert was the lucky one. Everyone seemed to feel that the two were good together, and by all accounts, happy. . . that is, until two years later when James returned home from the war.
That fateful night so long ago, Robert, Moira’s husband, woke up to an empty bed. A quick search of the house revealed no trace of her. Robert knew she liked to go down to the lake at night when she was restless and couldn’t sleep. The lake was the first spot Robert and Moira had ever made love, and the very same spot he had proposed to her.
As Robert approached the lake he heard the sound of voices, and his heart sank. He slowed his pace and stopped at a dark spot at the edge of the tree-lined water. In the moonlight, he could see Moira in the arms of another man, lips locked in a passionate kiss.
“I remember it plain as day.” As one local resident tells it. “He told me how he saw the two of 'em together, and how awful it was seein' her kiss another man. Then he heard James say somthin’ ‘bout how much he loved her and how they was goin’ be together. ‘Parently, Moira told him flat out she was already in love with Robert, not to mention married.
“Well, that angered the young man somethin’ fierce. When the girl turned around and started walkin’ away, the boy grabbed her. Almost out a’ nowhere, he had himself a knife up to the girl’s throat.
“Seein’ this, Robert ran out of the woods towards the girl, but he was too late. That sonofabitch slit the girl’s throat like it was nuthin’. That’s when Robert must’ve screamed or yelled or somethin’ cause he dropped the knife and the poor girl’s body goes topplin’ into the water.
“Next thing you know, the two men were strugglin’ on the ground. Robert saw the knife on the ground, grabbed it and cut the man’s throat right there. I tell you it’s just tragic what the poor man went through that night. I heard that he sat by the lake for hours, cryin’ an cryin’.
“Worst of all,” He added. “We got all them other murders there now. Can you imagine having to be reminded of a horrible thing like that over and over again? What kind a’ animal would do a thing like that? I’m surprised somethin’ like that wouldn’t make that man go crazy.”
“Chapter 10: A Love That Lasts Forever”
From the 2009 album “Moira’s Lake”, by Envinity
LYRICS
Sometimes it's hard to love the fleeting mist
The simplest touch goes missing like your kiss
Mornings I dread, the wait is much too long
You flicker away, but our moments are so strong
But if you love me I can be the one
I'll show how much I care
I'll stay with you if I'm the only one
I'll prove to you I care
Let's stay this way forever
Let's stay this way
STORY
APRIL 25th 1939. 10:40pm
Day after day, Jonathan had been plagued by visions of the girl. The visions were terrifying at first, but lately Jonathan noticed that the images of the girl around the house somehow no longer frightened him.
No longer was she the horrible phantom he had been seeing in the house. Her presence no longer inspired terror, in fact, quite the opposite.
Jonathan began waiting desperately until the sun went down, eager to see the beautiful girl again. He wanted so much to be able to touch her again, to hold her, to kiss her, to...
In the meantime, Jonathan relaxed into his chair and smiled as he watched images of the girl drift in and out of his loving gaze.
"I'll stay with you forever," he said with a quiet smile.
“Chapter 11: We’re A Part Of The Lie”
From the 2009 album “Moira’s Lake”, by Envinity
LYRICS
I felt so strange and all alone
Your absence made me fall apart
Without love, without you
And here I am with someone new
And still I feel that I just can't go on
Without love, without you
Other tried to fill your space
Even with this ring I'm incomplete
Without love, without you
For all we know out paths are pre-decided
For all we know the fate govern our lives
For all we know existence is a cycle
For all we know we've played these parts before
I woke up alone
You were no longer there
Why do I think that
Something is not right inside this bed
Your voice rang clear
Sounding out from the lake
You were not alone
Dear god is this really happening?
And every time my darkest memories saturate me in the flood
And from the deepest depths I've hidden what was true
I felt the shame and guilt from things nobody knew
I changed the facts and lived the lie to save myself
She loved him more than me and more than life itself
His body splashed into the waves under a moonlit sky
She took the knife and cut her throat, to live without she'd rather die
I held you by the water's edge
With desperate thoughts on how I could go on
Without love, without you
And looking back it's all so clear
That deep within your heart I always lived
Without love, without you
We're a part of the lie
The years make us question just what we still live for
Love is the ocean we drown in and die for
Some feel we're destined for all that we hope for
Maybe we only learn from what we abhor
The air brings a coldness that smacks of familiar
I've watched him so closely and I know the time's right
The signs are uncanny regardless of reason
And tonight it's calling and I know that he will die.
For all we know out paths are pre-decided
For all we know the fate govern our lives
For all we know existence is a cycle
For all we know nothing at all
Don't you feel this way?
As the sun falls down on me
I know this is truly meant to be
As the sun falls down
We live in the afterglow
Take this breath from me
Take this agony
Give my life for you now
With you I'll always be
STORY
APRIL 4th 1917. 2:15pm
Moira was feeling desperate and lonely, something she was not accustomed to. With James gone, she went from one boy to the next, but her whole life felt empty and meaningless. She was still getting all of the attention from men that she could ever want, but somehow, that was no longer enough.
James probably could have made a good husband. He had qualities that most of the others didn’t. Not only did she find him attractive, but also there was a depth to him that intrigued her. Most of the other boys wanted her for her looks, but she knew James saw beyond that. He truly loved her for who she was, and he was the only one who did.
But when Robert proposed to her, she thought about the stability, commitment, and caring he offered. Besides, she knew in her heart that James would never come back to her.
Robert was a simple, small town man who had never been married. He had probably never even dated a woman. Even though he was quite a bit older, his age was balanced with a certain inexperience and naiveté. He had always waited to settle down until he was stable enough to support someone and ready to marry. And he was blinded by the same beauty that had beset so many others.
Robert showered Moira with gifts and tokens of affection, including a new house near the lake where they’d been married. For a while Moira was happy, but soon she felt the familiar ache for something more.
Being the object of so many men’s desires made her feel good about herself. Nothing wrong with that, as long as Robert didn't know.
APRIL 26th 1919. 11:04pm
She was gone. Initially, Robert had thought nothing of the fact that Moira often disappeared in the middle of the night, only to be by his side in the morning. But as the frequency of these disappearances increased so did his curiosity.
One night he feigned sleep, waiting for her to leave. When Moira quietly crept out of bed and out the front door Robert followed.
Keeping his distance, Robert shadowed her down the path to the lake. At the clearing, Robert froze. His eyes widened in shock as he saw his beloved Moira in the arms of another man. They were kissing passionately, tumbling to the ground in urgent haste.
Robert’s hands were shaking in rage and betrayal. His perfect, loyal and pristine girl was being soiled by another man. But he couldn’t take his eyes off them as they made love under the moonlight.
As Moira put her clothes back on she said, "I love you, James. I love you with all my heart. Don't worry, we'll find a way for us to be together again." She kissed him gently and started down the path.
Seizing the moment, Robert jumped out from the woods. He grabbed the young man and they struggled. In fury, Robert reached into his pocket and pulled out his knife. In an instant, he had run the blade across the man’s throat.
James made a wet, gurgling noise and stumbled into the water, just as Moira came running back to the clearing. There in the moonlight, she saw her husband standing over the body. She screamed and ran over to James and cradled his head in her lap, silent tears streaming down her face.
Robert fell to his knees in shock and horror at what he had done. Moira flashed Robert a look of wretched emotion, and without thinking she grabbed the knife from the wet mud and pointed it towards him.
Her eyes were watery and sad. She took another look at her sweet James lying with his throat slit by the water, and looked back at Robert. Moira’s expression never changed or winced as she slit her own throat with the knife that had killed her beloved James.
APRIL 27th 1939. 12:31am
It was the anniversary of the tragedy of Moira and James––the very day 20 years later–– and he could feel it the power of it. He knew the potential significance of the night, and had to prepare himself. He had his suspicions of Jonathan. Mister hot-shot big-city novelist himself who had come into town and rented the very same house that James had rented so many years before. The more he thought about it the more it made sense.
The sheriff turned the key in the ignition, flipped on the headlamps and drove slowly towards the lake. Jonathan was going to die.
APRIL 26th 1939. 11:04pm
He waited in silence as his heart pounded faster. There it was again. Jonathan stared at the door, got up from his chair and apprehensively approached the entryway. He took a deep breath, and then slowly opened the door. It was her! He embraced her tightly as if they had been separated for decades.
She smiled warmly and kissed Jonathan softly. Without wasting any time, she took him by the hand and led him down the path through the woods. Jonathan was so overcome by her presence that his head was swimming. He had feared he would never see her again. But here she was, come back to him.
By the light of the pale moon, Jonathan devoured her greedily with his eyes. He was thick with emotion. She pulled him down on top of her by the water. A connection this deep could never be had in real life.
And Jonathan surrendered to the moment…to the inevitable.
She sat up, giggled innocently and kissed him once more. Jonathan smiled back and watched her walk out into the lake. And then she was gone. Jonathan stood up and walked closer to the shoreline. Silence. Just then, the wind began to pick up in the trees all around him enveloping him in the light howling of the forest.
As he looked back towards the lake, the glowing apparition appeared to him again. In the vague transparent figure, he could see the familiar and gorgeous face of the girl, and unlike his last encounter, he felt no fear. In fact, he felt quite at ease and comfortable in its presence, almost...at home.
The spirit, floating above the water, again beckoned to him. Jonathan smiled vacantly at the glowing girl. At that moment, something else caught his attention. Something reflecting the moon’s soft light. Something lying near his feet.
He never even heard the sound of an approaching automobile.
Jonathan picked up the shiny object and again stared into the face of the floating girl. He knew then that he would be with her forever.
Looking into her beautiful and hypnotic eyes, Jonathan smiled as he lifted the knife to his throat, and pulled the blade across his neck.
The water gently lapped at Jonathan’s body in a welcoming embrace. Sheriff Robert was too late.
You can also find this album here:
Or listen to our other albums:
Sweet Painful Reality
Slower, more melancholic and angsty
Empyreal Progeny
Heavy, more diverse, but still catchy
Purity
More accessible, musically varied, and introspective
Liner Notes
Year released:
2009.
Musicians:
Niko Van Steenhoven: vocals, synths.
John Taylor: distorted/clean/lead/acoustic guitars.
Bryan Romero: bass.
Eric Everhart: drums.
Composition info:
Music and lyrics written by Niko Van Steenhoven.
Additional arrangements by John Taylor and David McMillen.
Guitars written by Niko Van Steenhoven, John Taylor, David McMillen and Michael Dewey.
Crime scene photos by Bailey Wilson.
Production info:
Recorded at Crucial Fiction Studios.
Engineered, mixed, mastered and produced by Niko Van Steenhoven, with additional mixing assistance by Thomas Drinnen.
Photos
